Faithful friends are a sturdy shelter;
whoever finds one finds a treasure.
Faithful friends are beyond price,
no amount can balance their worth.
Faithful friends are life-saving medicine;
those who fear God will find them.
I recently had to put a dear friendship on hold. It was hard and difficult to come to the realization to begin with, but even more so in the execution. We've been friends for over a decade, which made taking this action even more difficult.
But what I have been finding in this time of reflection is that this friendship, while one that I truly cherish, is one of the few friendships that is not based in anything "churchy" - and it shows. Yet, it also has allowed me to see where I have been successful and where I have failed in bringing Christ into the friendship.
Yet, I've also noticed that, because our views and outlooks on life are based in two different camps, his postings on social media are more angry, sarcastic, cynical, and depressed. I, then, have to stand back and ask myself if this is the type of friendship that I want to be involved with. Coming from the camp that I do, I see joy in all things - even in the sufferings and frustrations of life; he sees a bleakness. I now have the opportunity to really ask myself the question: Is there some way in which I can introduce him to the true and fullness of joy that I feel and experience everyday? But the follow-up question has to be: Will he choose it?
Even in the midst of asking myself these questions, I have to admit that even though we don't see eye-to-eye on a lot of things, he's still a good friend to hang out with, watch a movie and have a beer with. And that's something that's good to have, especially when life in ministry becomes a little too much, and I just need a break for an evening. And this will force me at times to really seek out my brother priests for those moments when I need to talk out those moments in ministry - good and bad - when my view of the Lord becomes a bit obstructed by my pride or the world's interjection.
Having taken a step back, even if it's been a recent event, has helped me in understanding and appreciating this friendship, as well as all the other friendships that I share in. It's given me the chance to see which friends in my life are the "sturdy shelter", which ones are "beyond price", and which ones are "life-saving medicine". And it's given me an opportunity to come to know some of the other friendships in my life which I must step back from, if not turn away from all together.
Ultimately, I don't see the friendship ending. But I'm glad that I had the courage to step back for a little while, so that I could not only appreciate the friendship that has been there, but so that I can begin to work on a plan to ensure that this friendship can become as fruitful as possible - even if Christ isn't the main reason for our friendship. (That's not to say the Lord isn't a part of the friendship, but may become a stronger reason and bond as time goes on. [Here's to hoping!])
In the meantime, as I continue to work "behind the scenes" on this one particular friendship, it gives me an opportunity to work and appreciate the many other friendships in my life that I have been blessed with.
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Enjoy the journey . . .
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